Prove Her Wrong » prove her wrong

Getting Married Early

shopaholic7503 — Sun, 07 Feb 2010 07:39:39 +0000

I married early in life to get away from my mother. I was only 20 years old but I made sure that I married the man I love. He was someone I knew would take care of me. Now, we have been married for 15 years and I know I’m a lucky woman to have found my husband.

Back then, my mother did not approve of my early marriage but being stubborn as I was and wanting to get away from her, I insisted. Life was hard and I knew it wouldn’t be easy raising my own family but I found a different kind of joy in starting my own family. It felt as if finally, I had my very own family. I was overwhelmed with joy when I gave birth to my son. We’ve had a lot of ups and downs but my husband and I never let go of each other. We were always partners in everything.

My mother kept saying to me back then, what a huge mistake I made in marrying early but it was the best thing I did in my life. I’m not saying it is the best thing for everybody. In fact, I believe that you should wait for the right time and the right person to get married to but each and everyone of us have a different situation in life. Looking back now, I have no regrets. I have a wonderful family who loves me.

Going To College

shopaholic7503 — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 23:56:05 +0000

As a teenager at home, I wasn’t happy but outside of it, I guess I was. I was never in bad company. I had good friends. I was popular in highschool and my teachers loved me. They became my family although they never knew it. Time came when I had to go away for college. I was excited because of the sense of freedom but also scared because it was the first time for me to be away from home.

The first year of college, I had to live with some relatives who treated me much the same as my mother did. The thing when you’re adopted is that, people don’t always have to tell you but they always make sure that you feel that you’re really not part of them. I always tell myself that I should not let other people affect me. They should not stop me from doing what I’m supposed to do with my life and that being adopted is something not to be ashamed of.

And so, I lived a new life in college. I gained more friends and became more honest with myself. I knew I still had a lot to learn and I still am not finished with my battles but I am never going to give up.

Enemies

shopaholic7503 — Sun, 24 Jan 2010 23:36:37 +0000

“You have enemies? Good. That means you stood up for something, sometime in your life.” I read this somewhere. My mother was never my enemy. She was just always a symbol to me of sadness, fear and anger. Sadness, Fear, and Anger..they were my enemies. I wanted to save her but I couldn’t because she wanted to wallow in those feelings and took it out on me. I resolved I wouldn’t be like her. I would be the opposite when I grew up and had my own family. Some people stand up for something at a point in their lives but I have stood up for what I believed in all the 19 years I stayed with my mother and siblings. It was a constant battle of beliefs.

I made enemies in my life because of her. Though I didn’t want to be like her, in my heart I always wanted to please her and a point came when I had to hurt other people just to please her. There was a longing to be accepted and loved even if I knew it was never going to happen. I had never heard her say “I love you” either to me or my siblings or not even to my father when he was alive. She showed her love to my siblings by pushing them to be the best in school. I pushed myself to be the best so she would love me but that never worked.

Looking back now, perhaps she did love me in her own way…but whatever way that was, I never understood when I was young.